Good Day at School, or "Skinny Peppers"
I think today was a good day. Daisy was not upset about going to school and was excited for show-and-tell; she had a painted goose egg with Chinese characters to show the class. When I left her, she seemed resigned. I peeked back through the partition and she seemed to be on the outskirts of a group, which is how we've been seeing her pretty much every time we leave (something to ask the teacher about at my upcoming parent-teacher conference). Anyway, though, she seemed fine and was not crying. When I picked her up, she was happy to see me but when asked, said she had had a good day. I asked the head teacher, Jolanta, how she'd done at Show and Tell, and she told me Daisy spoke in a whisper and was very shy. She was supposed to walk around the circle showing all the kids her item, but Jolanta had had to hold her hand and Daisy didn't speak loud enough to be heard. Poor baby! Jolanta gave me the idea of practicing at home with a circle of stuffed animals, so I will do that. I was a painfully shy kid, so I can't help feeling for Daisy.
I checked Daisy's take-home art folder, and there were two paintings in there. I was looking at them, thinking, "How can they be sure these are Daisy's, when they have 29 kids?" And then I saw the title an adult had written in: "Skinny Peppers." My heart got all full, because that title is DEFINITELY a Daisy title. A mother knows. Someone was paying attention to her and wrote that title down for her. (It's not that I suspect the teachers of ignoring her intentionally, of course--they seem like lovely people and I know they do their best. It's just that there are 29 kids and four teachers, so you can't expect tons of one-on-one attention for your child.)
Daisy has been very tired lately because she has been having trouble sleeping at night. There are dark circles under her eyes that worry me. But, tired or not tired, she was a lot like her old self for the rest of the day: cheerful, dancing around. We met Dena and Henry and Robyn and Eli at Jamba Juice for a smoothie, and then we met Mark at the Rossi Playground. Mark had to return to work, but Daisy and I had our lunch on a bench and then played for awhile. Daisy met a very sweet older Indian boy who played hide and seek with her. I am always grateful for older kids who don't mind playing with a younger child, and it seems especially rare that an older boy (he looked 6 or 7) would play with a three-year-old girl. His mother told me he loves girls! I was thrilled to see Daisy so happy, smiling and laughing and running around with this boy. I am not quite sure why this isn't happening at school; at playgrounds, Daisy often befriends another child, often an older child but not always. She can be quite extroverted and friendly. At school, though, she seems quiet and nervous. That's something to ask about at my parent-teacher conference, too.
I was hoping the Indian family lived in the neighborhood, but sadly, they are from Sacramento so we will probably never see them again. This always seems to happen! The children Daisy befriends at playgrounds are usually from other places. I wonder if the gods are trying to tell me something....
EDIT
This afternoon after Daisy took her nap, she told us she "loved school" and that she was "very happy" there. We should be overjoyed, I guess, but I am not entirely sure I believe her. It's just so odd, given how she acted the first two weeks. Also, she continues to ask, "Is that enough school now?" I guess she didn't say that today, although she did ask us, for the four thousandth time, why parents aren't allowed to stay. This time, though, she seemed to accept our answer readily enough. Maybe she is telling the truth? I know it seems strange to suggest a three-year-old is just telling us what we want to hear, but I have seen this sort of thing in a smaller way from Daisy. Hmmmm. I dunno. Guess we'll see. There have definitely been some improvements. Today after school we bumped into one of her teachers at the playground and Daisy immediately wanted to run over and say hi, saying, "There's my teacher, Asako!" Sooo... yeah. Things at school are certainly improving.
EDIT #2
I really appreciate the way Daisy processes information and makes sense of it. Sometimes I can see it happening right before my eyes, as in today when she said, "Mama, remember the first day of school? I was calling out for you." She has brought this up with me many times (including on the first day, when it actually happened). But today I could tell she was reminiscing about it as a thing of the past, and something she has moved beyond. I felt proud of my big girl.
I checked Daisy's take-home art folder, and there were two paintings in there. I was looking at them, thinking, "How can they be sure these are Daisy's, when they have 29 kids?" And then I saw the title an adult had written in: "Skinny Peppers." My heart got all full, because that title is DEFINITELY a Daisy title. A mother knows. Someone was paying attention to her and wrote that title down for her. (It's not that I suspect the teachers of ignoring her intentionally, of course--they seem like lovely people and I know they do their best. It's just that there are 29 kids and four teachers, so you can't expect tons of one-on-one attention for your child.)
Daisy has been very tired lately because she has been having trouble sleeping at night. There are dark circles under her eyes that worry me. But, tired or not tired, she was a lot like her old self for the rest of the day: cheerful, dancing around. We met Dena and Henry and Robyn and Eli at Jamba Juice for a smoothie, and then we met Mark at the Rossi Playground. Mark had to return to work, but Daisy and I had our lunch on a bench and then played for awhile. Daisy met a very sweet older Indian boy who played hide and seek with her. I am always grateful for older kids who don't mind playing with a younger child, and it seems especially rare that an older boy (he looked 6 or 7) would play with a three-year-old girl. His mother told me he loves girls! I was thrilled to see Daisy so happy, smiling and laughing and running around with this boy. I am not quite sure why this isn't happening at school; at playgrounds, Daisy often befriends another child, often an older child but not always. She can be quite extroverted and friendly. At school, though, she seems quiet and nervous. That's something to ask about at my parent-teacher conference, too.
I was hoping the Indian family lived in the neighborhood, but sadly, they are from Sacramento so we will probably never see them again. This always seems to happen! The children Daisy befriends at playgrounds are usually from other places. I wonder if the gods are trying to tell me something....
EDIT
This afternoon after Daisy took her nap, she told us she "loved school" and that she was "very happy" there. We should be overjoyed, I guess, but I am not entirely sure I believe her. It's just so odd, given how she acted the first two weeks. Also, she continues to ask, "Is that enough school now?" I guess she didn't say that today, although she did ask us, for the four thousandth time, why parents aren't allowed to stay. This time, though, she seemed to accept our answer readily enough. Maybe she is telling the truth? I know it seems strange to suggest a three-year-old is just telling us what we want to hear, but I have seen this sort of thing in a smaller way from Daisy. Hmmmm. I dunno. Guess we'll see. There have definitely been some improvements. Today after school we bumped into one of her teachers at the playground and Daisy immediately wanted to run over and say hi, saying, "There's my teacher, Asako!" Sooo... yeah. Things at school are certainly improving.
EDIT #2
I really appreciate the way Daisy processes information and makes sense of it. Sometimes I can see it happening right before my eyes, as in today when she said, "Mama, remember the first day of school? I was calling out for you." She has brought this up with me many times (including on the first day, when it actually happened). But today I could tell she was reminiscing about it as a thing of the past, and something she has moved beyond. I felt proud of my big girl.
posted by Sarah Goss at 2:40 PM
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