Nap training
Daisy has been sleeping later in the morning lately, which is very nice for us. What do I mean by "later"? Well, she used to wake up around 6:30 AM, and recently she's been making it till 7:30 or even a bit later. That's great, but at the same time, her nap has been getting harder and harder, and we've had to start a new routine. More explanation below:
These last couple days have been some of the hardest for me as a mom thus far. We have been trying to help Daisy learn to take a nap without being rocked to sleep. I know, I know, I know: bad habit, the rocking, and we did it for two years. But we have an absolutely beautiful night-time routine, and so we didn't really feel like the nap was a hardship. However, the rocking hasn't been working too well lately. It's been taking forever to get her to sleep, and then she often screamed when we lowered her down into the crib. We realized that we needed a new nap routine and that we'd better figure it out now, before school starts up again.
We thought we'd try to translate our beautiful night routine to naptime. At night, we read some books, have some milk, spend a little time together in her room, and then she usually ASKS to go into the crib. We put her in, she smiles and wiggles around, we hand her her stuffed animals and put her "cozy blanket" on her; we say goodnight, I love you, and she says goodnight and I love you to us. We leave, and all is well. It wasn't ALWAYS like this, however, as anyone knows who's ever read my blog before! It took us about three days of letting her do some crying in the crib before she got used to it. This was painful, but well worth it.
So, for the last two days, Mark and I have been trying to do her nighttime routine at naptime. Day One, Monday, was TERRIBLE. She cried and screamed in the crib, and we could only stand it for about 25 minutes. Then we went and got her out. The rest of the day was pretty rocky, with her being so tired, but we knew that it probably wouldn't work on the first day. The whole point is that she's got to get used to a new routine, and the only way to do that is to be consistent for several days in a row, till she gets the picture.
We tried again today, around 12:45, and the same thing happened. She cried and screamed for about half an hour, at which point we couldn't take it anymore. We got her out and let her play, gave her snacks, etc. Then we decided to try again at around 3. I remembered that when we taught her to go to sleep on her own at night, one of the strategies that really helped was giving her a later bedtime, at first. She'd be so tired that she'd only whimper a little and then go to sleep. I figured the most important thing was for her to have the experience of falling asleep on her own in the crib, regardless of the time, and then we could start moving the bedtime earlier and earlier, as she got used to going in the crib awake. This worked very well. So-- maybe we should try the same thing with naptime. 3:00 is too late for Daisy's nap, ordinarily (she's quite tired by between noon and one). BUT, we needed for her to have that initial experience of going to sleep on her own in the daylight hours.
IT WORKED! We did the routine again--books, a little milk, then putting her in the crib and giving her her animals and cozy blanket--and this time she smiled, did her happy wiggle, and let us leave without crying. And she went to sleep. This is the first glimpse of hope I've had for our new nap routine. Now the trick will be to see if we can repeat the magic tomorrow, and gradually start to move the nap earlier, since I think ideally, her nap should start somewhere between noon and one, or one at the latest.
This stuff is hard.
These last couple days have been some of the hardest for me as a mom thus far. We have been trying to help Daisy learn to take a nap without being rocked to sleep. I know, I know, I know: bad habit, the rocking, and we did it for two years. But we have an absolutely beautiful night-time routine, and so we didn't really feel like the nap was a hardship. However, the rocking hasn't been working too well lately. It's been taking forever to get her to sleep, and then she often screamed when we lowered her down into the crib. We realized that we needed a new nap routine and that we'd better figure it out now, before school starts up again.
We thought we'd try to translate our beautiful night routine to naptime. At night, we read some books, have some milk, spend a little time together in her room, and then she usually ASKS to go into the crib. We put her in, she smiles and wiggles around, we hand her her stuffed animals and put her "cozy blanket" on her; we say goodnight, I love you, and she says goodnight and I love you to us. We leave, and all is well. It wasn't ALWAYS like this, however, as anyone knows who's ever read my blog before! It took us about three days of letting her do some crying in the crib before she got used to it. This was painful, but well worth it.
So, for the last two days, Mark and I have been trying to do her nighttime routine at naptime. Day One, Monday, was TERRIBLE. She cried and screamed in the crib, and we could only stand it for about 25 minutes. Then we went and got her out. The rest of the day was pretty rocky, with her being so tired, but we knew that it probably wouldn't work on the first day. The whole point is that she's got to get used to a new routine, and the only way to do that is to be consistent for several days in a row, till she gets the picture.
We tried again today, around 12:45, and the same thing happened. She cried and screamed for about half an hour, at which point we couldn't take it anymore. We got her out and let her play, gave her snacks, etc. Then we decided to try again at around 3. I remembered that when we taught her to go to sleep on her own at night, one of the strategies that really helped was giving her a later bedtime, at first. She'd be so tired that she'd only whimper a little and then go to sleep. I figured the most important thing was for her to have the experience of falling asleep on her own in the crib, regardless of the time, and then we could start moving the bedtime earlier and earlier, as she got used to going in the crib awake. This worked very well. So-- maybe we should try the same thing with naptime. 3:00 is too late for Daisy's nap, ordinarily (she's quite tired by between noon and one). BUT, we needed for her to have that initial experience of going to sleep on her own in the daylight hours.
IT WORKED! We did the routine again--books, a little milk, then putting her in the crib and giving her her animals and cozy blanket--and this time she smiled, did her happy wiggle, and let us leave without crying. And she went to sleep. This is the first glimpse of hope I've had for our new nap routine. Now the trick will be to see if we can repeat the magic tomorrow, and gradually start to move the nap earlier, since I think ideally, her nap should start somewhere between noon and one, or one at the latest.
This stuff is hard.
posted by Sarah Goss at 3:45 PM
4 Comments:
Here's the thing. In 15 years all the child rearing books will be enthusiastically recommending that two-year-olds be rocked to sleep. (Because it will do wonders for their psyches or some such.)
Every generation of babies gets mashed by the current theories.
Gompy
Hi Gompy! The thing is (mentioned briefly in my post) that rocking wasn't working anymore. She is two years old now-- very active-- and it was all we could do to confine her in our arms while we were rocking. She can wiggle right out. The last week that I did the rocking, it simply didn't work. I either couldn't get her to sleep at all, or if I did, she woke up and started screaming the second I put her in the crib. And Mom's back is bothering her so much that she could simply no longer stand up from the rocking chair holding Daisy, to put her in the crib.
So, to be totally clear, we didn't make the choice to stop the rocking method; it just stopped working. And I do think two years old is too old to be rocked to sleep for every nap, honestly. We are trying to help her learn to get to sleep on her own, which is a healthy thing, and I cannot believe she is getting "mashed." We never let her cry for too long.
Great to read your experiences. Our little bean is 3.5 months old and we're completely overwhelmed by all the sleep theories - good sleep, "junk" sleep, family bed vs "sleep training" etc. My head is about to explode - or is that due to my own lack of sleep?? I really appreciate the practical stuff you write. :)
Thank you! :-) I really appreciate it. I would love to see your blog sometime, too. I thought I'd record the experience I was having with the napping because it was worth having a record of something that WORKED; I have read so many books, too, and it gets very confusing, doesn't it? Your head starts spinning. So when something works, I want to take note of it. I may need to remind myself of it sometime. And it's wonderful to think it might help someone else, too!
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