Mom? Me?
Mark and I are making a photo album for the baby. The first two pictures are of us: one of me, pregnant (which I carefully labeled "Mom") and below it, a terrifying picture of Mark in KISS makeup (which I carefully labeled "Dad").
I then put in some pictures of my parents, and also labeled them "Mom" and "Dad," by instinct. Hmmmmm, it occurred to me. Something isn't quite right here. This photo album is rapidly collapsing into textual chaos. The baby will be utterly confused. Oh no.
So I put little arrows from the second "Moms" and "Dads" and wrote in "Grandma" and "Grandpa." Now the pictures of my mother say "Mom-Grandma."
The truth is-- this whole thing is weird. COULD I be "Mom"? It doesn't seem possible.
I then put in some pictures of my parents, and also labeled them "Mom" and "Dad," by instinct. Hmmmmm, it occurred to me. Something isn't quite right here. This photo album is rapidly collapsing into textual chaos. The baby will be utterly confused. Oh no.
So I put little arrows from the second "Moms" and "Dads" and wrote in "Grandma" and "Grandpa." Now the pictures of my mother say "Mom-Grandma."
The truth is-- this whole thing is weird. COULD I be "Mom"? It doesn't seem possible.
posted by Sarah Goss at 9:22 PM
15 Comments:
Sarah,
relax, your kid will be the coolest kid on the block, heck in the entire Zip code -- with a Mom like you and a Dad like Mark ---- I'd want YOU to be my parents.
Reni
I'll be "squeezing my thumbs" for you!!!!
You can and will be a fabulous mom! And I'll be the fabulous grandma! M.B.
Don't worry, the baby will already be confused by multiple pictures of her furry siblings and "Ace Frehley" aka Dad (only one picture of Dad in plainclothes so far in the album, folks!). However, it's SF so this will seem very normal to her...
We look forward to seeing a pic of the baby in her KISS outfit very soon!
Almost there! And so are we. See you soon!
Oooh, Katherine's right: the photo album depicts a space alien father and two fur-covered "brothers." It's even more disturbing than I'd realized!
Oh, thank you, Renate! I hope I can live up to this fabulous billing :-)
I *am* a pretty good cat mom...except for when I get really frustrated and yell, "Mark! Mark! Get Claude away from me, now! He's driving me crazy!"
I am afraid I have also called him an a**hole. But I don't think he understood me.
I bought him a birthday present! It's his own, brand-new, "Psycho Kitty" foodbowl. It cracks me up when he eats out of it because he doesn't even know that by doing so, he is agreeing that he is, indeed, the Psycho Kitty.
Thank you, Mom--I mean, er, Grand-maw.
See you soon, Albert!
In Chinese there are different words for paternal/maternal grandparents, but I can never get any of that straight.
That seems like a good idea, doesn't it? I think Mark's mom might be Nana and mine might be Grandma. But--superstitiousness is overtaking me and telling me to shut up, since there is no baby yet--just immense science fiction ripples indicating the likelihood of her existence :-)
I think your mother called her own grandma "Bubby."
Mom can definitely be "Bubby" if she wants to be. It's totally up to her. And what do *you* want to be called, Dad?
In class last week, the well-meaning Head of English Curriculum read us a charming children's story and pronounced "Bubby" to rhyme with "hubby." And I want it on record that I said NOTHING.
I had used up my snottiness points already, when she claimed that "dangling modifier" was just another name for a misplaced modifier.
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